My heart is heavy. I have not grieved enough. My beloved father passed away in September'24. Though his last few years were not exactly what he would have wanted for himself, or what we would have wished for him, it is still a great loss to have my darling father, my personal cheerleader pass away.
I was always the 'Apple of his eyes', his darling daughter who could do no wrong. He was proud of all my successes however small they were. When I was working in Citibank he would proudly proclaim, my daughter, Vice President in Citibank. When i was a homemaker in Zurich, he would say, my daughter who brings up two lovely children, drives on the cold snowy roads and runs a house by herself. And most recently when i got back to work at DB he would again say my daughter, VP at DB.
He supported me immensely in my studies and my career. With my Mum he would land up in Zurich, in London, look after the children, be at home, while i pursued one job after another, struggling to get back to full time work and climb the career ladder. He would gladly take on the most strange requests - I'm worried my nanny cannot drive the two screaming girls alone in the car- can you go with her for the first week to make sure she's driving the car confidently. Or, girls are getting bored, go walking with Mummy to the swimming pool and oversee their swimming lessons.
Daddy would happily wait to watch Chota Bheem or Karadi Tales with the girls, and then later in the night some Hind or English move with me. If i was coming come late at night in Bangalore, he would be waiting till I reached home.
Any trouble I had in my studies my Dad could solve. I don't like law college, am coming back to Delhi - no problem go do Maths in Stephens. Maths is so tough I'm going to fail, no problem, will find a tutor for you. Of course I was totally pampered but that's ok because once I got married I was not pampered even for a minute. So in life's overall balance i think it makes up.
What do I regret most, that I didn't spend more time with my Dad in the last few years. Work was just too all consuming and if not working then looking after the kids. Am glad I was able to help Dad write his autobiography but I never got the chance to learn bridge from him, speak to him about his police days, go for some concerts with him or watch some last few English movies with him.
Miss you dear Daddy. Keep looking out for us as you always do.
